3rd Graders Plot to Hurt Teacher
Wednesday, April 2nd, 2008
It is happening. Remember the Hello Kitty machine gun? WHAT DID I TELL YOU PEOPLE!!?? We must stop these children of the corn, and fast! It starts off as an innocent “Let’s handcuff our teacher and teach HER a lesson….with a knife…to the neck” and then before you know it, there are 8 year olds running the streets….with what you ask? WITH TERROR. That’s right. Their tiny eyes will be watching your every move….






A woman, no let me re-phrase that, a PREGNANT woman was hung in Papua New Guinea after her neighbor died. You know what their reasoning was? She was a sorceress! That explains everything!! Luckily, she was able to free herself, but in the process of struggling, gave birth to a healthy baby girl. Some might say that surviving a hanging and giving birth in the process confirms her witch-….ness? but I say, if someone was trying to kill me and my unborn child, you can count on me surviving that shiz.